Juggling an Overwhelming Schedule

I find most advice about juggling an overwhelming schedule to be unrealistic at best and generally annoying. I find that, when my schedule is overwhelming, it is not because I failed to plan or haven’t asked for help. It is because the actions that need to be taken are specific to me. My to do list is full of things that only I can do. That is just the reality sometimes, and telling me to ask for help is not at all helpful. I need to know how to survive the storm and get to the other side. I find when I’m overwhelmed, I don’t believe I will survive it successfully, and that is what overwhelms me the most. How to get to the other side without failing miserably along the way. If you’re like me, I just want to take a moment to tell you that you will make it and you are enough. You can survive this and come out the other side successfully.

Often times, we just need someone to listen to us without giving advice while we talk through what we are dealing with because, given the space, we can find our solutions. We don’t need guidance or advice; we need to be seen, heard, and validated. Having the truth of our existence and struggle acknowledged. Having someone acknowledge that there is no quick fix and because of that we need more emotional space can make a world of difference in our capacity. The things that can be outsourced are emotional support and ability to vent. If you do not have anyone in your life that can do that, making a voice note or journaling can help. Getting the words out of your body and into the world is a great way to excise negative emotions and gain clarity.

Something my clients find helpful is that I am usually able to predict how long things will be as bad as they currently are, and it has never been forever. In the thick of it, believing that this is not the new normal is really hard. I find looking at due dates for things helps and if something does not have a due date, giving it one really helps. For me and many of my clients, open-ended projects are the primary sources of feeling over taxed and that is because they have no end date. Knowing when something will end often makes it more bearable. Also, it can be useful to make an assessment of do you really want the outcome of any particular task, do you value it, and if you don’t can you take it off the list? Knowing what serves you and what does not and then focusing on what creates gains that are meaningful to you will help you make it to the other side while shifting some things off of the list.