Surviving a Crisis

If you are in crisis, the first thing to do is understand that this is not your forever. The second thing to do is understand that now is not the time to make any major changes. The second thing can seem counter-intuitive, but when we study our biology, we find that the chemicals our body creates during change and during crisis are almost exactly the same. It is our perceptions that determine whether or not we process the chemical reactions as excitement, joy, or stress. Research informs us that the best way to deescalate a crisis or transition out of crisis mode is with small, incremental steps. Knowing which step to take first requires us to take a breath and ask ourselves “what small thing can I change today to have more mental and emotional space tomorrow?”

We need to be selfish and focus on our own needs if we are to create the space we need to breathe and see things more objectively. We also need to view ourselves positively and treat ourselves with kindness. I know I talk about good self-care a lot, but it truly is central to having more good days than bad. The basic building blocks of good self-care are drinking enough water, eating enough rich in nutrients healthy food, and getting enough sleep. When our body is well cared for, our thoughts become less negative and less frantic. Creating a healthy head space is key to problem solving. A crisis is simply an unexpected problem that, no matter how complex, can be solved. Every situation can be improved no matter how bleak it may seem at the moment.

Changing our self-talk from negative to positive helps create the mental space necessary to start problem solving with hope. Once we have hope on board, we can create our action plan. Without hope, this can be extremely difficult. I advise my clients to start with one thought. Change your mind about one thing. It can be anything. I advise something small. Investigate one of your beliefs and find out if it is true. I mean exactly true the way you believe it today. I find that, whenever we explore our opinions, there is always room for more nuance. It is through this understanding and process of changing our minds that we begin to hope. If you are feeling hopeless but are able to change your thinking then you know that there is room for hope. I promise that hope is never false. I promise that whatever crisis you are experiencing, it is not your forever.