Developing Permission Structures

Permission structures are our internal justifications for the way we see ourselves and the world. How flexible and how ridged our permission structures are determine how easy or difficult it is to change. Looking at our core beliefs and how they were developed provides a pathway to deconstructing permission structures that are holding us back. For example, if we can’t we “can’t” or “shouldn’t” do something that will improve our well-being, that is usually down to not giving ourselves permission to do so. A belief that something is not for us is tied to our existing permission structures. When we find ourselves unable to move forward in life, an ingrained belief is the barrier. Understanding how our permission structures came to be allows us to use the current pathways to change our foundational beliefs.

Foundational beliefs are the bedrock of our identity and begin forming at birth. By age 5, we generally have a basic idea of who we are socially and within our family structure. During puberty, we develop our understanding of our place in the world. This always blows my mind because I don’t know any adult who thinks a 5 year old or a young teen should be allowed to define them. Yet, we allow who we were as a teen to determine the foundation of our permission structure. The foundation of how we understand the world. This is why it is so important to take in new knowledge of ourselves and our place in the world. We need to continually update who we are and how we fit into the world.

Ask yourself: what evidence do you have to support your beliefs? Really challenge and play Devil’s advocate and seek out information that challenges your beliefs. Ask yourself if your current understanding of yourself serves you and deconstruct the parts that don’t. Reflect on who you want to be and each day take one step towards being that person. You can achieve this by acknowledging that your current foundational beliefs and reactions based on those beliefs no longer serve you. Then give yourself permission to challenge and change those beliefs. By letting yourself know that it is ok to change, you can create a new permission structure for yourself that supports change and being who you truly want to be.